In This Week’s Mallard

blog-art,-11-23-2015

Free Speech is dying on college campuses, and lots of college administrators apparently think that’s great! Wimpy schools, from Missouri to Dartmouth, are siding with conformity and censorship against independent thought and contending ideas, which are what universities used to say they were all about.

The Mainstream Media don’t seem to care, either; they do lots of stories about kids who feel “uncomfortable” hearing ideas that they disagree with, but very few about the way these kids bully and shut down other students, speakers and teachers with whom they disagree.
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Mallard SHAMED!!

Blog-Art-11-8-2015

On Wednesday, Mallard admits he was terribly wrong, and alert readers caught it!

But first: “Student Athlete” an Oxy-Moron?…this week, Mallard celebrates the start of the college-basketball season!

Also, he faces the grim reality of the passing years…his favorite bar is gentrifying before his very eyes.

And, as always, every comic strip is 100 percent gluten-free!

DON’T WEAR THIS, TOO!

    Beginning Wednesday, Mallard puts his Mary Worth costume back on, to give more handy, helpful, gluten-free advice on Halloween costumes. (This is a figure of speech; Mallard practically never wears his Mary Worth costume, and that wasn’t him in that grainy video). 

Guest stars this week will include The Donald, The Hillary, some Swiss guy, PLUS, can you find Mallard’s favorite Viking costume? (It’s not who you’d think). (It’s not Adrian Peterson, either.) humanthumb

DON’T WEAR THIS!!!

    This week in Mallard Fillmore, Mallard gives free, helpful advice on “Halloween costumes to avoid” !

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    Restaurants have to provide those “nutrition facts” that nobody reads; I’m providing, coercion-free, a handy field guide to what NOT TO WEAR this Halloween, effortlessly spanning categories including the trite, the overly complicated, the too-scary and, of course, the ones that might offend the Habitually Offended Community.

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It’s ZERO-TOLERANCE WEEK in Mallard Fillmore:

Remember when that seven-year-old got suspended for “biting his Pop-Tart into the shape of a gun” (The little hooligan claimed it was a “mountain,” but why take chances?) Or the little girl who got suspended for saying her magic ring could make her classmates invisible, like in Lord of the Rings? There were hundreds of such “Zero-Tolerance cases around the country the past few years.
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This week in Mallard Fillmore…

Psychic Update (in which I predict the contents of this week’s Mallard Fillmore strips!)
1. The issue NONE of the candidates has addressed? America’s bear-selfie problem. Bears are not taking selfies; people are taking selfies with wild bears. In the woods. But Mallard has it covered. Both he and The President of the United States will weigh in on the issue.
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